It is Gatsby

"It makes me sad because I have never seen such beautiful shirts." 

Gatsby. It's him. Still the same amazing beautiful Gatsby. With his beautiful house, and him beautiful organ and a view that some may say is beautiful too. Although to me, the view breaks my heart. I see my house and I realize that I soon have to go back to that. Away from Gatsby's beautiful house fit for a king and a queen and half a dozen children and back to a disguised hell hole where the phone rings non stop. And on the other end of the line Tom's lusty she-devil or devils, he thinks I do not know about. And  a daughter with the man I once had an exciting lusty relationship with. I felt so dumb today. As he was throwing some of his expensive shirts at me today I started to cry. I just realized I missed out on so much of Gatsby's success I never got to share it with him. I have wealth but, wealth and success are not the same things. Even though I am wealthy, sometimes, even though I have a house full of servants a little girl and Tom I feel lonely. Tom is respected I should be happy with him. Happy in the way I was with Jay and how I was when Tom and I started seeing each other. Jay wants me to tell To that I do never loved him. I don't know how I could lie to Tom like that or Jay or myself. Why can't Jay just understand that I love him now. That should be enough.